My Abortion Stories -Patreon Exclusive

Patreon Exclusive

My Abortion Stories

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I can’t pinpoint why I became pro-abortion; I also don’t remember thinking a person’s right to an abortion should be a decision by an entity outside their body. No one had to convince me whether an embryo was a human baby or just cells. I didn’t need to hear stories of abuse, rape, or incest and how an abortion can free a pregnant person of burden, shame, or being forced to raise children they didn’t want. I just always thought abortion was normal, and natural I guess. Now, I never had conversations with my mother about abortion, she wasn’t screaming pro-choice up in down the halls of our Bronx apartment, but it was implied. My mother became a mother at the age of 16 in the ’60s and had no choice. Parenthood wasn’t something she decided to do, and she had to rise to the occasion and raise my older brother. She continued not having this choice or access to birth control that I have now. Her decisions of parenthood were made for her. Although the delivery wasn’t ideal, it was always clear to me that my mom wanted me to be ready for parenthood, to enjoy that immense change in my life, so she always made it clear that I better not bring a baby home, and if I did it would be taken care of.

As I  got older, the community around me also didn’t vilify abortion. I knew of many girls in the mosque I grew up in who got them secretly. However, it was haram to receive the procedure. I still recall it being a solution that kept us girls free. Based on the music, television, and the other people around me, abortion seemed like a  solution to an unplanned pregnancy that could change the trajectory of your life. So although no one in my life had used the language of pro-choice in my circles, it was clear the women in my community were. The normalization of abortion in my life, even in secret, made my decision to get an abortion twice the easiest decision in my life.

Since  2019 Ohio, Georgia, Louisiana, Missouri, Alabama, Kentucky, South Carolina, and  Texas passed different iterations of legislation known as the Heartbeat Bill. The Heartbeat bill is an abortion restriction legislation in the United States, making abortions illegal when the embryonic or fetal heartbeat can be detected. This means abortion is unlawful if a pregnant person has a procedure after 6weeks of pregnancy, which is usually when most people learn of their pregnancy. These laws will affect Black people who get pregnant immensely, be it by forced parenthood or criminalization. When these bills were introduced in 2019, this deeply touched me, and it made me want to speak about my abortions.  I had already added being pro-choice to my womanist politic and saw these as violent acts toward Black people. I was triggered by seeing laws be passed that could control my body. Being a descendant of enslaved Africans living in the USA, I could never support anything that would regulate when I reproduce. I also stated this while I appeared on Grapevine TV’s pro-life vs. pro-choice episode. I refuse to let a White supremacist, capitalistic country that controlled my ancestor’s wombs ever to control Black people’s wombs again, and I mean that shit.

I used that time to share my abortion stories and not keep them a secret anymore, cause as the internets says, it needs to be normalized.  I have been open about having two abortions with friends, lovers, and romantic partners, but it’s still taboo to discuss. Also, I realized all the stories in media about the procedure were one-sided; it was always a sad grief-filled story, which wasn’t the case for me. I wanted my account heard, so I told my story on Vageestem podcast. . . .

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